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Batman v Superman Fails In All the Ways That Man of Steel Succeeded

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I like Ben Affleck. Good Affleck, bad Affleck — I don’t care. I like Reindeer Games. I love Shakespeare in Love. I don’t like Clerks 2 or Runner Runner or Surviving Christmas, but I can make the most of them, similar to the way I use over-ripe bananas to make delicious banana bread.

I do not wish to see Batman v Superman. It looks and sounds and smells like a movie so over-ripe, that it will not produce the Affleck banana bread I seek. I suspect Ben Affleck knows this, and not just on some broad level, but on the individual level. Ben Affleck knows that someone who likes him unconditionally — read: me — will not be seeing his movie. And that makes him sad.

You can see that sadness in this video, above, which I very much enjoy watching because it stars Ben Affleck.

Ben Affleck!

Ben Affleck! by emilygiota featuring J. Peterman

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